When I first arrived in Denmark, I saw something I haven’t seen since, which was a parade of Danish soldiers walking down the street.
These were soldiers that were just back from duty in a very violent war zone, and what I remember most about the parade is that the crowd was entirely silent.
I gave a weak little cheer – hooray! – because that’s what I would do in my own culture, but I was the only one.
I remember reading in the media afterwards that it was difficult for Danes to understand how well-raised Danish boys could get involved in any type of war, any type of military activity that might involve hurting people.
Well-raised Danish boys would always be peaceful.
“Conflict-Shy?”
I don’t know if the recent conflict in Ukraine has changed that belief, as people realize that aggressive warfare can still happen in Europe. Violence sometimes comes to you, whether you like it or not.
But I’m often told that in their daily lives Danes are “conflict-shy”, or konfliktsky in Danish.
I don’t think this is true. They are happy to loudly share their opinions in situations where they don’t have to deal with the fallout, like yelling at you as they whizz past you in the bicycle lanes. If you try to catch up with them to continue the conversation, they’ll bike away pretty fast.
They’re happy to share their opinion, they just don’t want to hear yours.